Today in philosophy we spent half an hour inviting ourselves over to Prof.Miller's house for dinner, an hour talking about life, and ten minutes talking about the final. As always, class was great.
The whole conversation about life started when Miller asked us what things worried us. And I said getting a job after graduation. [
haha damn I just realized that I was the one that launched us into this whole discussion. Definitely didn't see that coming]. Then Miller launched into a surprisingly inspirational rant. I say surprisingly
cuz this guy is usually quite sarcastic and cynical. But today he expressed overwhelming amounts of hope for us. Odd. What follows is a giant paraphrase/indirect quote of what he said:
Get out of this area and go somewhere you've never been. This is your time to live. This time is for yourself. You can go anywhere. You have nothing tying you down. Don't be afraid to take a dive into independence. Sure, it's scary. Sure, you'll be lonely. Sure, it'll be really hard. But you'll come out better for it. And you'll make it.
...
You've selected this liberal arts path. What they teach you here is to think. To think about things structurally [this is a structuralism and post-structuralism class]. Most people will see a problem and just try and solve the problem but you guys will see the problem with the structure. And if you start at some crap job, you'll be working for someone who is not as smart as you. And you're going to know how to fix their problems but no one is going to listen to you. And you're not going to be able to live with that. We're not trained to get normal jobs. We're
trained to be different. If you wanted a conventional job then you would've gone to a state school; you wouldn't be here. [I take issue with this last sentence later].
...
Don't let yourself fall into a conventional job. I'm not saying go and start a non-profit organization but make your own path. I don't like the term trailblazer. Like instead of going to law school and trying to fight the system from without, join the police force and fight it from within.
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Anyways, Miller was far more eloquent than what I just wrote. He said some things in the beginning that I disagreed with, but he clarified later and I think by the end I got that he was really emphasizing approach. How you approach your job. Like take him for instance. He went into teaching. He's a professor. But he approaches his teaching unconventionally. Case in point the class we had today. He talked to us about life for an hour and a half. And it was a great discussion.
One of the things I raised a problem with was that our education couldn't just be for the sake of learning, that it has to affect our job. Yes learning is
transformative, but can't you let it transform you as a person but not necessarily take that into your job? But then even in your job you're a person. You're never not a person. True. But what if you decide to get married and have kids right after you graduate. Are you really utilizing all of your undergraduate skills? Perhaps. But then you could argue that for any job couldn't you? Even the "conventional ones." And why can't we approach our education as this learning experience that doesn't necessarily have to affect our job decisions?
He also seemed to imply that our job defines us. But really a job is just one compartment of our lives and you can find fulfillment in other parts of your life. This is when the class sort of jumped on me. It's always interesting when it's you versus the class. And by class I mean the four other people who were taking issue with what I was saying. Elliot asked "But wouldn't you say that being a student defines you?" And I had to answer no. That was exactly why I went abroad because I felt that I was only defined as a college student. I needed to get out and see some of the world and in some cliche sense "find myself." I knew myself SO MUCH better coming out of study abroad than going in. Because I didn't just see myself as a student working to get a B.A. in English and then going on to get a job. I found myself in other venues of life. And in the same way I don't think a job defines you as a person.
"But as an adult you spend most of your time at your job."
Yes you do. And for some people they need a job that's fulfilling, that makes them happy. I am one of those people. If I
didn't like my job I would hate my life. But there are plenty of other people who can isolate their work from who they are as a person. They can approach work as just something to pay the bills. Work is necessity and they find fulfillment in other parts of their life. And I guess a couple other people couldn't conceive that you could be happy with who you are if you hate your job. And I admit that I have trouble seeing that as well. But I guess I have a problem with prescribing one kind of lifestyle approach for everyone because people are different. And as hard as it is to imagine your shitty job not affecting you as a person, I believe that there are people like that out there. It is probably my worst case scenario but hey I'm an idealist. I want my life to be in a Disneyland dreamworld.
As depressing as it is to think of someone who hates their job I find it equally as depressing to think of someone who loves their job and let's that define them. How one-dimensional. We are so much more than just our occupations. And that leads me to say that you can be the person you are, that you can be fulfilled, even if you don't like your job. But at the same time, going over to the other side, if you spend so much time at your job and you don't like it how could you live with yourself as a person. You never stop being a person. You're a person even in your job. If your education has transformed you as a person you bring that to your job. You can't not. Or can't you? Zach gave an example of a recent
Haverford grad who works for an insurance company and basically what he does is help the insurance
company find ways of paying the least amount of money as they can to people who apply for insurance. Does this friend know that it's wrong? yes. But can he separate who he is from his job? I would hate myself, but maybe he can do it.
At the end Miller basically said that sure we don't have to do these things. We can find a normal job. But what he wants us to know is that we CAN do these new things and we should leave it open. We don't have to, but we have the ability. And I found that last statement the most inspiring because right now I'm planning my future around my fears. I've always had this fantasy of just picking up after graduation and traveling for a year or moving to a new city and just finding my way. But the closer it gets, the closer I am to not doing it. Why? Because I don't want to fail. I don't want to be alone. And it's even more practical than that. I have a shit ton of loans and I need a job with money to pay them back. But if I take Jerry Miller's prescription, then things will work out because I will make them work when it comes down to it. Will I be able to live with myself when ten years down the line I'm in a stable job but I never took this opportunity to go out and live?
When I was a kid I would have fantasies about going to the East Coast for college. About just getting up and leaving California to try something new. The further into high school I got, the more I distanced myself from that idea because the college mentality in high school was
UC and
CSU oriented. But at the end of it I said fuck it this is my one chance I'm going to do it. So I did. And I've never regretted it. So why don't I just do that now? Where do I want to go? Seattle maybe? I would love to live in Seattle. What's tying me down? Nothing really except that boyfriend of mine. Oh what do I do with him.
fuckin med school. Anyways, those are thoughts not for this blog.
But what's holding us back from going somewhere new? Get out of our comfort zones, get away from safety, and take a dive into independence. Sounds great. A bit
romanticized perhaps but is that such a bad thing?
